


MIssing You (Aaron Pauley)

by TheRutabaga



Category: Of Mice & Men (Band)
Genre: Depression, Evil Rutabaga, F/M, Heartwetching, Memories, Romance, Suicide, dream - Freeform, shocking, surprise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2016-12-03
Packaged: 2018-09-06 03:44:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8733526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRutabaga/pseuds/TheRutabaga
Summary: The five stages of Grief:  Denial  Anger  Bargaining   Sadness  Acceptance   Sadness was the stage Aaron Pauley found himself at after his best friend killed herself, breaking his heart into a thousand pieces. On the day of her funeral, Aaron is given a letter from Brooke, his best friend. The letter begins his journey of finding out the secrets that went to Brooklyn's grave along with her.   The road to acceptance is slow, just know it's okay to let them go and be happy without them.





	

**Author's Note:**

> To my dear Nan, my MIssing You.
> 
> 08-28-16

Aaron's Point Of View 

 

I sat staring at the ceiling, my eyes still filled with tears. She was dead. Brooklyn was dead. I felt my tears spill over again. She had been dead for three days. I still couldn't grasp it. I was in a state of depression, yet I kept denying she was dead; that I would see her in a few days when she would grab me for a crazy plan she had come up with. That only made me worse. I heard a knock on the door. 

"Go away!" I yelled. I still heard the door creak open. 

"Aaron, baby?" I heard Amanda calling my name softly. She had been carefully treading around the situation with Brooklyn. She spoke to me as if I was a wounded animal that would try to run if she approached me too quickly.

"Go away, Amanda." I told her harshly, turning onto my side. She still walked over to me, laying behind me and putting her arms around me. "I said go away." I pushed her arms off me. She sighed and kissed my shoulder.

"I love you, Aaron." She reminded me. I ignored her. She got off the bed and walked out of the room. I heard the door close behind her. 

"I'm sorry, Brooke." I said quietly, feeling just another tear streak down my face. 

 

 

I looked at my best friend's blue eyes as she looked down at the milk shake she was drinking. She giggled when she noticed I was looking at her. 

"Why are you looking at me?" She asked, blushing. She always hated people staring at her, but I could never help myself. 

"Because you're beautiful." I told her. Brooke giggled shyly. I, of course, knew she was anything but.

"Am not." She protested She had a pale complexion, black hair, sapphire blue eyes, and a petite build. I thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. She had a deep red blush painting her cheeks. "I love you, Brooke." I told her. She smiled. 

"I love you, too, Aaron. So, are we going skating after this?" She asked. I nodded. She looked back down at her milkshake and stirred it with her straw. "I miss this when you're on tour. At least when you're home I can see you when you're not with Amanda." I reached across the table, smiling softer. 

"Brooke, you will forever be my number one girl." I told her, running my thumb across her knuckles. She smiled. "So, Princess, shall we go to skate?" I asked her, standing before holding my hand out to her. She grinned and took my hand. 

"Yes, my slave. We shall."

 

I opened my eyes, realizing it was just an old memory. I got up. It was the morning of Brooklyn's funeral. I put on a black button up and black dress pants. I got ready before going to leave. 

"Aaron, do you want me to come with you?" Amanda asked from the kitchen. 

"No. I'll be fine. You never liked Brooklyn anyways." I pointed out, not caring if I struck a nerve in Amanda or not. All through highschool, Amanda was jealous of Brooke. Brooke had been my best friend for forever. 

"Okay. I love you." She said before I left. 

 

After the funeral, I was standing watching the grave tenders fill in her grave. The one shot me a sympathetic look. I ignored it and continued to watch my precious Brooklyn's casket being covered up. Brooke's mother came up behind me, placing a hand on my back. 

"Aaron, I think you've taken this the hardest." Mrs. Cass said softly. I felt sadness over take me again. I clenched my teeth and shrugged.

"I was on tour when she did it. I could have saved her! I was too busy with Amanda and tour and the band to realize she was hurting!" I yelled, finally releasing my anger towards myself. Mrs. Cass handed me an envelope. 

"She left you this. She was holding it when I found her." I looked down at it. It was addressed to me in Brooke's beautiful cursive with doodles all over it. I felt my throat closing. "I'll see you later Aaron." Then she left me to stare at the letter from my dead best friend.

A few hours later, I came home and walked back to the office. I shut the door and locked it before I sat down in the chair. I was still holding the letter. I slid the seal open and pulled out the white sheet of paper. Brooke had handwritten it- something she hates to do. 

"Dear Aaron, 

I'm sorry. I had to. I didn't want to worry you. I knew I was minuscule compared to the fact that you have hundreds of kids with scars coming up to you everyday. 

Next, I should tell you that I'll miss you. You were one of the greatest things in my life and the best person I had ever met. But that's why I left. I love you. I wanted you to be mine and mine alone. I know you love Amanda and I could never ask you to leave her for me. You love the stability of one person for countless years. I could never ask you to give that up.

I should probably tell you why. I am done. I want you and you alone. I don't want to go to work tomorrow and deal with my isolation of nobody wanting to work with me. I don't want to see the disappointment on my mother's face when I told her that I would probably never give her grandkids. I recently went to the doctor and found out I was barren. I should have called you, but I didn't want you to worry about me or come off tour. 

I love you so much. I knew one good bye wouldn't be enough. So, there are more. 

You and I use to go here as kids and get snow cones during the summers every Tuesday. 

I love you so much, Aaron. 

Love, Brooke."

 

I wiped my tears away. I knew so much now. I knew why. I knew I could never be the same. She felt the same way about me as I felt about her. I got up and walked out. I walked into the bedroom and started packing a bag. Amanda walked in. 

"Aaron, is everything alright?" She asked.

"No." I said. I walked out and grabbed my acoustic guitar. 

"What's that letter in your hand?" She demanded. 

"A goodbye letter from Brooklyn. I have to go for awhile. We can talk about everything when I come back." I told her briefly. 

"So, I'm going to loose my fiancé to a dead girl?!" She yelled. 

"No. I was never yours to begin with." I slammed the door behind me before walking out of the apartment. 

I went downstairs and put my stuff in the backseat before getting in and driving to my parents' house. My mom opened the door. She just hugged me and I cried. 

"Mom, she loved me. She loved me and I never knew. I loved her, and she always thought I would choose Amanda over her." I said through sobs. Mom rubbed my back.

"I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry."

 

A\N: If you read Princess (my Cody Carson one shot) and almost cried over it, you'll sob over this! Enjoy my latest Aaron Pauley short story, 

MIssing You


End file.
